Wednesday, April 12, 2006

More of April's consolations.



This month really is the cruellest this year: I feel as though I'm on a rollercoaster with someone half-awake at the controls, and that someone is me and the coaster just keeps plunging down, and I just keep gritting and going and drowsing and doing. More and more, I'm grateful for the quiet noise of intense color in those Ottawan galleries. But look: today, magnolia and hyacinth and daffodils and treebuds, clamoring for notice, elbowing each other out of the way to get in line for the pictures, and the scent on the streets of the village is something I would put in this writing if I could. Six p.m. found me crouching beside flower beds, then coming home to be bowled over all over again by my tree. I must have taken sixty pictures of the tree alone. Not a single one is a particularly good picture, and yet they all look beautiful to me.

Within days I may be able to write lengthily again. For now, I give myself flowers on the last night of my life as a twentysomething, and I give myself the scent of the street and the lawn and the fallen petals after our freak flash-through thunderstorm, and you can share them, if you'd like, because I'm friendly like that, always did know how to play well with others, once I got over the initial awkward shyness.


7 Comments:

Anonymous dagger aleph said...

Enjoy your last night as a twenty-something. Sounds like you're off to a tranquil, ruminative start to your thirties. Or I hope you are.

Oh, to be thirty again.

[my verification code is quxit. Which is "quit", with an "x" smack in the middle. What are the gods trying to tell me???]

11:09 PM, April 12, 2006  
Blogger tim r said...

Happy 30th! It hope it has been happy.

I want a tree. Plus, I need to get out and take some more photos. Your blog is so inspiring.

4:13 AM, April 13, 2006  
Blogger amanda said...

Oh, fellow Aries, happiest of days. You are an old sould and a young heart at the same time--the best of combinations.

9:33 AM, April 13, 2006  
Blogger Dr. S said...

I should have known you were also an Aries. When is your day?

9:56 AM, April 13, 2006  
Blogger Dr. S said...

Oh, and @DA: I was totally totally asleep when you wrote that message. Not quite so tranquilly as I might have liked, perhaps, but sleeping nonetheless, and it was zonked bliss.

9:58 AM, April 13, 2006  
Blogger Dr. S said...

And @Tim: thank you for the birthday wishes and the compliment. I aim to inspire. The (slight) drawback is that it takes me a long, long time to get places now, because I'm always stopping and shooting something. But, if one has to have a crazy small town identity, I suppose "crazy picture-taking lady" is a good one.

9:59 AM, April 13, 2006  
Blogger ttractor said...

happy birthday!

I was thinking of writing a post "art makes me late for work" coz I keep stopping to shoot things and looking like a real dork doing it. glad to know I am not the only one in this half of the country!

wokbamh!

2:16 PM, April 13, 2006  

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